The Research-Based Argument Essay, Study Guides, Projects, Research of Voice

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Lucy Calkins, Mary Ehrenworth, and Annie Taranto

Photography by Peter Cunningham

heinemann ◆ Portsmouth, NH

The Research-Based Argument Essay

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Contents

Acknowledgments • iii Welcome to the Unit • vi

Bend I Establishing and Supporting Positions

1. Investigating to Understand an Argument • 2 In this session, you’ll teach students that when argument writers begin to research a topic, they investigate and collect information about both sides of the issue. 2. Flash-Drafting Arguments • 15 In this session, you’ll remind children that writers often use what they know about structuring an essay to help them quickly write a full, rough draft of their argument. 3. Using Evidence to Build Arguments • 27 In this session, you’ll teach students that argument writers conduct research and provide evidence that supports their claim. 4. Using Quotations to Bolster an Argument • 39 In this session, you’ll teach students that argument writers add relevant quotes to make their arguments more potent, and you’ll set them up to conduct an inquiry into what makes a quote powerful. 5. Redrafting to Add More Evidence • 49 In this session, you could teach students that writers draft and draft again, setting them up to write a new draft that incorporates additional evidence and thinking. 6. Balancing Evidence with Analysis • 56 In this session, you’ll teach students that writers analyze their evidence and explain their thinking, so that their own voice is powerful throughout their writing. 7. Signed, Sealed, Delivered • 66 In this session, you could teach students that writers carefully consider a variety of formats and choose the one that will effectively convey their message.

Bend II Building Powerful Arguments

8. Taking Arguments Up a Notch • 72 In this session, you’ll teach students that when starting a research project, writers think about how to capture the information they need, setting up systems to collect their knowledge and research, thus setting themselves up to write a lot. 9. Bringing a Critical Perspective to Writing • 83 In this session, you’ll teach students that writers bring all that they know about reading critically into writing critically.

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Clearly, the goals of this unit are big ones; it is rigorous work. As argument writers, students are expected to structure their writing so that it includes claims that are supported by reasons that are backed by evidence. As part of this, you’ll teach your students to sort, weigh, and order evidence. They’ll learn to suspend judgment, to read critically, to note-take, to build an argument, and to revise and rethink and rebuild. This work focuses on Common Core writing standard 1, which for fifth grade states, “Students will write opinion pieces or topics, supporting a point of view with reasons and information.” Of the subskills, you’ll pay particular attention to helping your students “create an organizational structure in which ideas are logically grouped to support the writer’s purpose.” Students will have been working on this goal for years, and by now, you’ll be able to tap that acquired expertise so they can easily think inside the structures they take on. Because your students will enter this unit positioned to meet the fifth- grade standards, and because the expectations of middle school students are facing them, this unit goes well beyond the fifth-grade standards alone. For example, while those standards ask for students to organize their writing in logical groupings, you’ll take the emphasis on logic further. The goal of your unit can be summarized this way: teach students to argue logically by teaching them to analyze texts, to weigh evidence, and to consider logical reasoning. You will reach up to the seventh-grade standards, even, by teaching students to consider two important elements—audience appeal and counterargument. Of course, for students to write argument texts well, they need to draw on their entire skill set as writers (not just as persuasive writers). In this unit, you will convey to students the expectation that they plan and rehearse their writing; collect, sort, and select from an abundance of specific information; assess their writing using checklists; study and emulate the work of mentor

T

HE FREEDOM TO ARGUE is one of our most important freedoms. As long as we can write and talk to create change, we have a precious freedom indeed. This is the glory of participatory democracy. It is no wonder, then, that when the effort was made to unite all fifty states around common standards, argument was featured in those standards. Argument is part and parcel of what it means to be a citizen in a democracy. That is, when you teach your students to argue with logic as well as passion (and to listen to and read the arguments of others, testing them for their logic and cred- ibility), you teach them to become discriminating and credible, influential and engaged. You teach not only a skill but an identity and a way of life that is essential in a democracy. Of course, argument is also essential to the academy, the university, and knowledgeable professionals everywhere. Nothing is more important than the ability to weigh conflicting views and to decide thoughtfully on one’s own posi- tion, and then to articulate that position in ways that are convincing to others. Think, for example, about your response to any of the new developments in the field of education: the push for privatization, the effort to evaluate teacher proficiency through test scores and other measures, the Common Core State Standards themselves. The teaching profession relies on you and your col- leagues being knowledgeable about these developments and speaking out in ways that are compelling and credible. As Diane Ravitch, former assistant secretary of education and a leading educational historian said recently at a keynote to Teachers College Reading and Writing Project principals, “Politi- cians are—and must be—followers. They follow public opinion. So the future of education is in your hands.” We must use our skills in argument writing to have a voice in the greatest makeover of public education that this nation has ever seen!

Welcome to the Unit

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WelcometotheUnit vii

You may be surprised by the fact that we assign students a topic for the first portion of this unit. We’ve struggled with this as well and tried teaching the unit in many different ways to offer students choices and still provide them the support we think is important. After great deliberation, we hold that the demands on students are sizeable and that students’ work during the first portion of this unit is best supported when they are able to work with a carefully constructed text set of articles and videotapes. Although there is nothing magical about the issue of whether chocolate milk should or should not be served in elementary schools, many hundreds of teachers have piloted this unit using that topic and the corresponding text set of materials, and therefore we have been able to work the kinks out of these. You can, of course, choose an alternative topic. The unit is constructed so that the topic is almost a case in point, and another topic could be substituted. Should you decide to select another topic, you can find alternative text sets on our website (www. readingandwritingproject.com). In the unit’s first bend, as students explore the issue of whether chocolate milk should be served, you will guide them to understand that to develop a solid argument, they need to research both sides of an issue, postponing a quick, premature conclusion until the actual evidence is cumulated and reviewed. Once students have studied texts—both print and digital—that advance different perspectives on the issue, you will teach them to consider the warrant behind arguments in those texts, reading these critically. Students will then begin to plan and write their own arguments, and for now, this will lead them to draft letters to the principal on this whole-class topic. To write persuasive letters, students will draw on all they know about structuring persuasive essays. You will also teach them to cull evidence from sources and to analyze their data. As part of this work, you’ll show them how to interpret the data from the texts they are reading, analyzing the numbers and doing the math. The writing process, in this instance, is a process of composing an argument, and you’ll coach students to make decisions about which information to quote and which to paraphrase and about ways to set the context for the evidence they ultimately decide to include in their letters. The second bend begins with a response from the principal in which she invites students to further research whether or not chocolate milk should be in schools and to craft position papers, or argument essays, to be presented to panels of administrators, parents, and cafeteria workers. With their charge set, students will return to research, thinking about the possible systems for

writers; draw on a host of revision and editing strategies as well as knowledge of good writing to improve their drafts; meet publishing deadlines; and help each other within a community of writers. This work will stand on the shoul- ders of all the work your students have been doing up until now (a goal of all units, but one that is particularly essential here). With all the opinion and argument writing they have done across the grades, we feel they are ready to reach forward, and we want to send them on with the greatest possible powers as writers. You will put a new emphasis on partner talk within this unit of study and demonstrate that one productive way to talk is to deliberately take different positions and engage in an information debate. You’ll teach your students debating moves. As they engage in debates, you’ll help them argue not with emotion and folk knowledge, but with evidence and logic. Then as your stu- dents write, too, you will help them to shift from offering personal opinions and preferences to staking claims and backing those claims with reasons and evidence. Threading throughout this entire unit is an emphasis on critical reading, which supports the fifth-grade reading standard: “explain how an author uses reasons and evidence to support particular points in a text, identifying which reasons and evidence support which points.” This also supports CCSS W5.9, “draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflec- tion, and research.” Finally, like other fifth-grade units, this unit also supports efficiency, tak- ing students through more than one round of writing and providing them with multiple opportunities to write “flash-drafts.” In this way, they learn to write powerfully in short periods of time, transferring writing skills developed through slower, deeper work into more compressed time frames. That work, what the standards describe as “planning, revising, editing, rewriting,” using technology for research and for publishing, is inherent in this unit, as in prior units.

OVERVIEW OF THE UNIT

At the start of the unit, students will investigate and write argument essays about whether or not chocolate milk should be served in schools. As students explore that issue, they’ll read texts, both digital and print, exploring the rea- sons for and against flavored milk in schools. These resources can be found on the CD-ROM.

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WelcometotheUnit ix

GETTING READY

In this unit, research and knowledge are at the heart of student writing. To write well, they must be knowledgeable about the topic; they need several texts with which to work. So, as you prepare for this unit, you will need to select a class topic for all students to research and write about in the first two bends and then gather a text set, one that includes both print and digital texts and that includes texts that represent both sides of the issue. You also may choose to include some more nuanced texts for students to study as they grow more sophisticated at critical reading and more adept at navigating the art of argument. We recommend studying the debate over chocolate milk in schools; the text set to support that can be found on the CD-ROM. Prior to beginning, you will want to print the articles and make copies for the class (we recommend “Nutrition in Disguise” and “Chocolate Milk: More Harmful Than Healthful” to start). If you are able to show videos, they will add to your unit, but they are not essential. You might cue up videos on class computers for students to watch and take notes during independent writing; if you do that, we recom- mend “Sugar Overload” and “Flavored Milk: Tasty Nutrition.” Some of the teaching in this unit, much as in the unit before this one, is implicit. Students will learn by studying the arguments of others. You will want to have mentor essays for students to study as they write. We recommend using the drafts and essays highlighted throughout the unit, those written by Jack as a sixth-grader. These can be found on the CD-ROM, and you will likely want to print them and make copies for students to refer to as they work.

level for the writing, then look to the descriptors of that level to identify spe- cific ways each child can improve. If a writer’s essay is level 5, you and that writer can look at the descriptors of, say, elaboration, providing reasons and evidence for those reasons, and note whether the writing adheres to those. If so, tell that child—or your whole class, if this is broadly applicable—“You used to support your reasons by... ,” and read the descriptors from the prior level “but now you are... ,” and read the level 5 descriptor. “Can I give you a pointer about a way to make your writing even better? You could try... ,” and read from the level 6 descriptor. You can even say, “Let me show you an example,” and then cite a section of the level 6 exemplar text. If, in prior units, you duplicated students’ on-demand writing and taped it into their writing notebooks, you will want to do so again now. Your students should be familiar with the checklists by now, so you might ask them to assess their own on-demand writing, gathering a baseline. Then, as students dive into the work of this unit, they can work toward their self-set goals. They might put their on-demand writing side by side with their work inside the unit, looking to see if they have maintained the quality of their work as well as to see how their work is growing progressively stronger as they move through the bends. At the end of the unit, you’ll assess again. You could give the same task, on a different topic, with a different text set. We’ve found, though, that there is something very powerful for children in doing it again—using the same texts—and then laying their two pieces alongside each other and marking them up, annotating them, and showing off their new skills. It’s just easier to see the new writing work when the research is the same.

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56 Grade 5: The Research-Based Argument Essay

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Hen tHeY reaCHed tHis session, some of the teachers who recently taught this unit began noting something that has caused its fair share of angst. By this point, students were beginning to back one side of an argument, to provide supporting reasons, and to fish for quotes to weave in. it looked like all the teaching of the past four sessions was sinking in. But the resulting writing was far from gratifying. instead, draft upon draft of student work showed a lackluster uniformity, almost as if the essays had been cut from the same voiceless mold. why was the voice vanishing? don Murray defines voice in Writing to Deadline as “the cry i made from the crib, the sounds i learned, the power of I. the grand ego from which all writers are bred.” Many agree that it qualifies as the most elusive of all qualities to actually teach the writer. the fact is that children will lose and find their voice many times as they move beyond the crib, the nursery, the yard, and into the world—as they develop into themselves. Voice will deepen, become more thoughtful, as children learn when to lower it in a whisper and when to let it ring high. although it’s not unusual for writing to become robotic for a time, if you’re finding that your writers’ voices are vanishing from the page, it is time to take action and lure them back, stronger and more purposeful than before. this is the session to begin that work. “i see the evidence and the quotes you’re picking from the texts and the world around you,” you will acknowledge. “But readers also need to know what you make of those quotes.” there is a turning point at this part of the unit. we’re emphasizing that it is impor- tant to strengthen the writer’s voice while maintaining a well-informed expert perspective. the challenge is to help children find balance between the research or the evidence out there versus the opinions and personal experiences that can only bubble forth from the life that the writer knows best: his or her own.

Common Core State StandardS: W.5.1, W.5.9.b, W.6.1, RI.5.1, RI.6.1, SL.5.1, SL.5.3, L.5.1, L.5.2, L.5.

In thIs sessIon, you’ll teach students that writers analyze

their evidence and explain their thinking, so that their own voice is powerful throughout their writing.

G E T T I N G R E A D Y ✔ ✔ Images of layer cakes (Google images “layer cakes”)—optional (see Connection) ✔ ✔ An excerpt of a student essay in which the child includes evidence but no analysis as well as the excerpt revised to include evidence and analysis (see Teaching) ✔ ✔ “Questions to Help Writers Analyze Evidence/Fortify Their Thinking” chart (see Teaching) ✔ ✔ “Ways to Push Our Thinking” chart (see Teaching and Conferring) ✔ ✔ Students’ writing folders with the drafts of their letters (see Active Engagement and Share) ✔ ✔ “How to Write an Argument” chart (see Link) ✔ ✔ Pens, pencils, or thin-tipped markers in various colors (see Conferring) ✔ ✔ Example of a block quote to whittle down (see Mid-Workshop Teaching)

session 6

Balancing Evidence with Analysis

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58 Grade 5: The Research-Based Argument Essay

TEACHING

Offer two methods for developing thinking about evidence. Begin with a list of predictable strategies writers ask themselves. “Writers, picture that your evidence is the cake part and your thinking is the frosting. The trick of this work is to not just plop more and more evidence into your writing. You have to remember toexplain the significance of your evidence in order to bind it together the way frosting holds the cake together. This means really analyzing the evidence in your text and explaining your thinking.

“There are a couple of methods writers use to make sure to analyze evidence and get their thinking into their writing. One might be new to you, and one I’m sure you’ll remember from writing other essays, and from the work you did in memoir. Let me show both to you, and then you can do some work to see which methods can help you become a more powerful writer.”

Offer an anchor chart of predictable questions writers can ask to help them add their own thinking in response to text evidence. “Writers, one method I use to analyze evidence is that I ask myself some predictable questions. These are the kinds of questions that writers who do research often ask themselves about their evidence.” I displayed the chart that I had prepared earlier.

“Let me give you a quick example of how helpful these questions can be to a writer. You know the writer Jack? I remem- ber, as he was writing, he was getting into a rut with including only evidence without any analysis. He had just written a bunch of facts, like this.”

There’s one more reason why chocolate milk should be served in schools. The famous nutritionist showed that chocolate milk has a lot less sugar and carbohydrates than soda and power drinks like gatorade.

“Hmm, this does feel as if it’s all cake and no frosting to bind it together, right? It’s just piece of evidence, with no thinking. I imagine that as Jack was revising, he probably asked himself some of these questions. Listen to how his draft changed after he did this.”

There’s one more reason why chocolate milk should be served in schools. The famous nutritionist showed that chocolate milk has a lot less sugar and carbohydrates than soda and power drinks like gatorade. So if kids get in the habit of drinking milk in school, then they’ll probably skip the sodas outside of school. The famous nutritionist didn’t actually say this as a fact, this is my interpretation, but it was the facts her kids pointed out about how soda has more sugar, that made me think of it.

Questions to Help Writers Analyze Evidence/Fortify Their Thinking Why did I include this evidence? How does this evidence relate back to my claim? What makes this particular quote or statistic so important? How is this evidence changing my thinking?

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Session 6: Balancing Evidence with Analysis 59

It will be important for you to help kids think through the logistics of adding their thinking into their drafts. You might coach students to put a star where they want to insert that think- ing and then actually write that thinking down in their notebook or they could add spider legs or use Post-its as they’ve done before. if students are working digitally they can add this think- ing as insertions to their word-processed drafts. One note: if your students are working digi- tally, be sure to save each flash draft as its own document, both so students do truly start fresh and can write a lot with each new draft and so they can compare how their writing has grown and changed.

Demonstrate asking and answering a couple of these questions. Be sure to highlight your extended thinking. “I’m going to imagine now that I’m Jack asking myself one of the questions,” I continued. I used one voice for asking questions and another for answering them. “What makes this particular quote or statistic so important?” I asked myself in a professorial voice.

“Well, I included this evidence about how that nutritionist said that chocolate milk has less sugar and carbohydrates in it because it makes chocolate milk seem much healthier than soda. I mean, everyone knows that soda isn’t really good for you.”

“Let me try another one,” I said, switching back to my regular voice before asking in my professor voice, “How is this evidence changing my thinking?”

As Jack, I answered, “Well, if chocolate milk is healthier than soda, it makes me think it’s a good thing for kids to have it in school because maybe they’ll get in the habit of having it, and they’ll like it so much they’ll drink chocolate milk instead of soda at home, too. I wasn’t thinking about that before, how it could change the choices kids’ make outside of school. I should definitely write all of that down!”

Looking up and switching back to my regular voice again, I said, “Of course, I’m just guessing what Jack might have done. But he certainly could have asked himself these questions to get to that deep thinking he added into his draft.”

Fig. 6–1 Jack’s evidence and his analysis of the evidence

1 2 3

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Session 6: Balancing Evidence with Analysis 61

one ingredient when deciding if something is healthy or not. Chocolate milk seems unhealthy because of the extra sugar, but when you look at what else it has, it isn’t so bad at all. In fact, seems to me like kids should be drinking more of it.”

I leaned in and said to Kennedy, “You should tell Sarah, ‘Quick! Write that down!’”

Reconvene students and highlight the work of a successful partnership discussion, then offer a tip to extend students’ transference and independence with this skill. After a bit, I convened the students.

“Writers, you have a lot of strong thinking to add to your letters now, so I want to give you some feedback. Kennedy listened to Sarah read part of her letter, and then rather than wait for her to think about what to say next, Kennedy went ahead and asked her some of these questions—and Sarah had a lot more to say! So you can ask each other these ques- tions during partner talk, or when you’re writing alone, just ask yourself. Then take a moment to write your new thinking.

“The other tip I’ll give you is that when one question or prompt doesn’t lead you to develop your thinking, just try another one, or think of a different question. It’s not any specific question or prompt that is magic. It’s that you work hard at explaining yourown thinking about the topic and what your evidence is making you think.”

LINK

Send your writers off, reminding them to be sure to always analyze their evidence whenever they are writing from research and suggesting they start fresh with a new draft. “Okay, writers, let’s get you off to writing while your thinking is fresh. You’ve learned a ton of strategies to make your arguments strong and your pieces grow stronger and more convincing each day. Yesterday you redrafted, incorporating all your evidence into your letters. Now, you might take some time to reread and revise those drafts.” I pointed to the chart “How to Write an Argument.” “As you reread and revise your work, remember that whenever you are incorporating evidence into your writing, it’s important to analyze and explain that evidence. Your voice matters! If you find places that were all evidence and no analysis, grow some think- ing. You might grab a revision strip, write down your thoughts, and tape it onto your draft. You might find you need more room than that because you have too many ideas to write just a sen- tence or two. If that’s the case, put a star on your draft to note that you want to add your thinking there, and then open your notebook and write your ideas down. Go to it.”

How to Write an Argument

• Collect evidence that allows you to think through various sides of an argument.
• Rehearse by explaining your posi- tion and listing your reasons point by point.
• Plan your claim and reasons into boxes-and-bullets structure.
• Use evidence to support your reasons.
  • Paraphrase, putting it into your own words.
  • Quote, and then unpack the quote, showing how it relates to the reason.
  • Introduce the source and explain the connection.
  • Use “set-up” language to prop up your sources (transitional phrases).
  • Analyze and explain the evidence.

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L

OOK OVER STUDENTS’ WORK. You’ll see who is especially struggling with the challenge of explaining evidence. You might also sift through the final pieces from the research unit to see who, by the end of that unit, was still simply plopping quotes into their writing without setting up or unpacking those quotes. Those writers will probably need your support here.

As you look at student writing, don’t be deceived by volume. You will be looking, this time, for evidence of the writer’sthinking. Look for what students have done to unpack the evidence they include. Often this work can be deceptive. Paragraphs can be packed with vital, accurate information that links to the point. So at a glance it could seem as though the argument has been made and the writer has made his point. But if you look more closely, you may see that some of these writers are recounting information only. Take Daniel’s work, for example (see Figure 6–2). His draft is packed with information but light on analysis or reflection, such as this passage:

I think chocolate milk should be banned from schools, because of the huge amount of sugar and how many carbohydrates it has. White milk in the schools has 14 grams of sugar, fat free choco- late milk has 20 grams of sugar, and fat free strawberry milk has 27 grams of sugar, which is equal to 8 ounces of Coke. In the article, “Schools may ban chocolate milk over added sugar” it says, “Chocolate milk is soda in drag” and “If you have flavored milk, that’s candy.” Also it says, “It works as a great treat at homes but it doesn’t belong in schools.” According to a video on NBC News called “Milk Dud: Schools rule out chocolate milk,” it states that if a child drinks chocolate milk every day for breakfast and lunch, in a year they would have 15 pounds of sugar, which equals more than 100 cans of soda. This is why I think schools should ban choc- olate and flavored milk from schools.

CONFERRING AND SMALL-GROUP WORK

Marking Up Writing for Important Parts

Claim, Evidence, and Thinking

MID-WORKSHOP TEACHING

Whittle Away Everything that Doesn’t Support the Point

“Writers, let’s pause for a moment. Getting just the right balance of quoted text and your own thinking is tricky. Many of you are including large blocks of quotations from articles, and sometimes those quotations go on for so long that they dwarf the other parts of your writing—like your thinking! It’s hard for me, as a reader, to figure out your point. There are too many points! “Michelangelo, one of the most famous artists in all of history, once described how he went about taking a block of marble and turning it into a sculpture— say, of a lion. He said, “I just carve away anything that doesn’t look like a lion, and I’m left with a lion.” In a way, you need to do that same work. Imagine that the part of the quote that supports your argument is the lion and you need to cut away the rest of that quote. “Let’s say I am arguing that chocolate milk should be banned from schools because the sugar in it makes kids hyperactive. I found this quotation to help. Think for a second about what you’d carve away. What isn’t exactly helping my point?” “Chocolate milk is soda [dressed up],” said Ann Cooper, the head of nutrition services for the Boulder Valley School District in Louisville, Colorado. They do not allow flavored milk in their schools. “It works as a treat in homes, but it doesn’t belong in schools.” “Yes, the point about chocolate milk being dressed-up soda is not my lion. I should cross it out. I think that I should keep this: ‘It works as a treat in homes, but it doesn’t belong in schools.’ That totally fits my argument that the sugar in chocolate milk makes kids hyperactive, which might be okay at home, but not in school. So I’m going to cut away everything that isn’t that lion. Make sure that you, too, are whittling quotations down to what’s essential!”

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64 Grade 5: The Research-Based Argument Essay

Tell students that once they’ve chosen supportive quotes, writers work to situate those quotes within a context. “Writers, you have all focused on selecting quotes that support your evidence (and making sure you choose only those parts of the quoted text are strongest— your lion) and then wrapping your thinking and your voice around those quotes to bolster your argument. Sometimes quoting is tricky because even when you’ve carved out the lion—the perfect bit of text in support of your argument—for it to make sense, the reader needs more than just a line or two. The reader needs context. It doesn’t work to just have a bunch of random lions flying around. They need some ground to stand on, or the quotes won’t make sense and won’t support your argument.

“The articles from which you are gathering your evidence had to handle this same task. Each of those authors had to think, ‘How do I set this up so my reader understands it, it makes sense, and it supports my argument?’

“Instead of just quoting tons and tons, authors first carve out the lion. They choose only those parts of a quoted text that directly support their argument. Andthen they think about how to situate the quote so that it makes sense. Often, authors paraphrase to set the context and then quote just the part that they really want the reader to hear.”

Set kids up to work with partners to create a context for quotes by paraphrasing. “Right now, take a look at your letter with your partner. Look at the quoting you did. And when you notice huge, long quotes, giant chunks of text, think about which parts you might paraphrase and which parts you might quote. And when you notice focused quotes that seem to be floating around without any ground beneath them, think about how paraphrasing might help add context. ”

As Angel shared her writing with Alex, he asked, “What part of this did you really want to put in your letter? Like, what are the important lines?” Angel shared that she wanted to quote the line about being able tounteach kids to drink chocolate milk (see Figure 6–3). Alex responded, “So then you don’t need to quote the stuff about Cooper and others.” The two of them tried to find a way to cut out the part they didn’t need from the original:

Another reason I think chocolate milk should not be in school because now kids are preferring chocolate milk more than plain milk. In the article is says “Cooper and others argued children will drink chocolate milk so we can unteach them that, Cooper said. Our kids line up for milk.”

SHARE

Setting the Context for a Quotation

Fig. 6–3 This quote needs to be revised to provide only information that is necessary in order for it to make sense to the reader.

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Session 6: Balancing Evidence with Analysis 65

Angel suggested, “Maybe I could say, ‘Many people think that kids would choose plain milk if they didn’t have choco- late milk around. Anne Cooper is one of them. She says... and then I could quote her.’” She revised her draft (see Figure 6–4) so it now read:

Another reason I think chocolate milk should not be in school because now kids are preferring chocolate milk more than plain milk. Many people think that kids would chose plain milk if they didn’t have chocolate milk around. Anne Cooper is one of them. She says, “We’ve taught them to drink chocolate milk so we can unteach them that, Cooper said. Our kids line up for milk.”

“So, writers, as you continue quoting, remember that sometimes writers need to paraphrase in order to quote. They need to create a context in which the quotes make sense. And they can often use their own words, summarizing or paraphrasing a bit to do so.”

SESSION 6 HOMEWORK

usE QuOTATIONs spArINGLy writers, when you were young, you learned to use exclamation marks to show excitement. Chances are good that before long, your writing was full of exclamation points—rows of them for some events and big fat bold exclamations for other events. i remember one student telling me he uses one for happiness and a whole row of them for someone’s birthday and big bold exclamations when “a guy’s dying.” when i taught little kids, i always knew that on the day after i taught them to use exclamation marks, i’d teach them to not use them—or more accurately, i’d teach them to use them sparingly.

so tonight i want to teach you that quotations, too, are often overused. think of them as like exclamation marks. they spice up a draft. they add energy and voice. But quotes are like special sauces. You don’t want to splatter them everywhere, or they won’t be special. Your draft will be weakened by excessive use of quotation marks. so look at the amount of your text that is your own writing, and make sure that at least three quarters of your text is your writing, and if that’s not the case, eliminate some quotations and instead, paraphrase (which means talking in your own words about what you have learned). to paraphrase a quotation, reread it, think about what you have learned that matters and how that information connects with what you were already saying, and then talk to your reader about your thinking. if your ideas stand on the shoulders of the person you were quoting, reference that person, but you needn’t quote.

Meanwhile, your writing needs to be almost done, so read it over, thinking about other ways to strengthen it, and be sure that the work you bring to school tomorrow represents your best work.

Fig. 6–4 Paraphrasing helps to situate the quote so it makes sense.

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