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BENEFITS OF COUNSELING
Spending time with a counselor - a counselor is someone who is completely
outside your problems, who offers an opportunity for change.
Counseling gives an opportunity for “me time.” It is a place where you talk
about what you choose for a whole hour, it is the “talking cure.”
Counseling provides a time and a place in your busy lives where you can
take a long honest look at what is distressing you. It is somewhere you can
explore issues, raise awareness, develop powers of self-reflection and feel encouraged to generate new understanding.
With the support of a counselor , you can find ways to accept and make
peace with things you can’t change and make positive changes where you
can. With counseling you become aware that you have choices in life.
Gradually you get a sense that you can be whoever and however you want
to be. This may sound like a form of escapism or delusion but it is rooted in
the findings of psychology which attest the theory that the way people
think determines their sense of self, other people and the world around
them as well as their abilities to cope with stressful problems. Neuroscience
has proved the human ability to build new neutral pathways in the brain as
a method of developing a more creative and expansive view of our lives
and coping with the world around us.
You can question and challenge things that feel fixed in stone. Yes, you can,
with the counselors help, explore what really matters to you, what and
who to value, your beliefs, hopes and needs. In other words, counseling
helps people to discover and express their authentic, genuine, true self
rather than the self they think they need to put forward for other people’s
approval.
Counseling gives you an opportunity to articulate your thoughts and hear
yourself say them loud. Putting difficult thoughts and emotions into
words, bringing them out into the open, can bring tremendous relief.
When talking with a counselor you have the opportunity, if you choose to
be different than you would normally be. You don’t have to pretend that
you are on top of things but try and be yourself.
In counseling you can uncover your true feelings, discover new ways to
express yourself, reconnect with your strengths, look at your values, your
weaknesses, personality traits and who and what is important in your life.
You will come to appreciate your strengths and competencies and also
accept that it is OK to be imperfect because being imperfect is part of being
human condition. Counseling is also, most importantly, a place that we
learn to respect and care for ourselves.
LAYERS OF NEUROSIS:
Here are tips to help you get into contact with the real you step by step.
- Phony layer : Refer to the fake ways we relate with others by playing games, living in fantasy, being insincere, and maintaining masks. Once we become aware of this and become honest with ourselves we experience unpleasantness and pain.
- Able to think well of yourself - Having a more clear image of yourself - Able to handle situations in your life - More in charge of your life - (^) More sensitive to needs of others - More predictable - Committed to your personal growth
How can you increase self awareness?
- Through self assessment of: feelings, thoughts, behaviors, life experiences, attitude and habits. - Through information: feedback received from significant others.
Questions to keep reflecting on:
- Where am I in my life journey? - What cultural factors influence me? - (^) What are the influences of the nuclear and extended family in which I was born? - In my education, how much effort am I putting? - In my physical appearance, how do I view myself? - My vulnerabilities (we are all wounded in some way) e.g. what are my deepest fears? Energizing or crushing? What makes me angry? How do I express it? - My image of God. Distance or near? Loving father or judge?
Set goals of your ambitions below.
And, before setting your goals learn the difference between a dream and a goal, a goal and a plan, and, a plan and an action.
A dream written down with a date becomes a goal.
A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan.
A plan backed by an action makes your dreams come true.
Remember, discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments.
Do not judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plan.
Perfection is not attainable but if you can chase perfection you can catch excellence.
There will always be people telling you: you can’t! Look them in the eyes and say; watch me!
REFLECTION:
Infuse your life with action.
Don’t wait for it to happen.
Make it happen.
Make your own future.
Make your own hope.
Make your own love.
And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator,
Not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high,
But by doing what you can to make grace happen…
You, right now, right here on earth.
Belief in yourself!
Have faith in your abilities!
The will to win,
The desire to succeed,
The urge to reach your full potential….
…………………………….I will achieve this by (date)
(4)…………………………………………………………………………………… ……………………………………………………………………………………… ………………………….....I will achieve this by (date )
(5)…………………………………………………………………………………… …………… ………………………………………………………………………… …………………………… .I will achieve this by (date)
“Problems do not go away. They must be worked through or else they remain
forever a barrier to the growth and development of the spirit.” ( Peck, p.20)
