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Essay Writing (Key-hole Format)
ORGANIZATION OVERVIEW:
introductory Consisting of: General opening statement paragraph Other statements expanding on previous one **Thesis statement (very specific)
body of essay Consisting of: Several paragraphs with supporting details
concluding Consisting of: Thesis statement (reworded) paragraph Other statements General parting thought
ORGANIZATION:
A. Introductory Paragraph
- think of the first paragraph as a funnel (a general opening statement on the assigned topic, other sentences expanding on the topic, and finally, a thesis statement ).
a) Opening Sentence
- should catch the reader’s attention about the topic discussed.
- may be an observation about how the topic applies to life in general, etc.
- *avoid beginning with a definition of a term.
e.g. Topic: war Opening sentence: Throughout history, war has affected people’s lives. e.g. Topic: love Opening sentence: The love between a parent and a child is unbreakable.
b) Other Sentences Expanding on the Topic
- explain the topic expressed in the first statement in more detail and work your way down to the thesis statement (usually two to four sentences).
- give some examples or discuss a certain situation related to the topic.
- give more of an explanation related to the topic.
- use an example from a movie or another work (describe relevant scene,
situation, etc.)
e.g. Topic: taking risks Opening sentence: People take risks every day of their lives. Supporting Sentences: For example, a person may be struck by a vehicle when crossing the street. Perhaps an individual may choke on a piece of candy when snacking. Others choose to take risks by joining the Armed Forces, skydiving, or skateboarding for instance. Even in 1960s America, people seized the opportunity to reach goals regardless of the possibility of personal injury or harm to others.
*** c) Thesis Statement ***
- the clearest place for the thesis statement is at the end of the opening paragraph.
- this statement clearly indicates what you will be proving with respect to the topic given.
- typically, the assigned topic will require you to create a theme and to place it in the thesis statement. ****a theme is different than the thesis statement!**
- it is placed within a thesis statement (if required).
- the theme indicates what point the author of the work in question was making about the topic. The thesis statement indicates you are going to prove that the author was making this point about the topic (see examples below).
- to improve your thesis statement, imply the organization of your essay (main paragraphs) with it along with the theme.
e.g. Sample Essay Question: In The Outsiders, what idea (theme) does the author
develop regarding risk-taking?
*Step #1- Theme: People who take huge risks may suffer severe consequences physically and/or emotionally.
(Note: when expressing a theme, use the word, may , to imply that it does not happen all of the time AND try to suggest the consequences experienced.)
*Step #2- Paragraph Topics (although many typically focus on three different characters, a stronger essay may come from a focus on one character dealing with three key scenes/situations/relationships, etc.)
Step #3 - *Determine the order of importance of the paragraphs (begin with the 2nd^ most important, working your way to the least, and end with the most important paragraph).
usually, occasionally, or may which are more accurate in expressing the story’s central purpose. The word, may , is probably the best one to use in wording your theme. (See highlighted words in the previous examples.)
- Since the theme is the central and unifying idea of a short story, it should account for all the major details in the story and must not be contradicted by any significant detail. The theme should be based on what is found inside the story as opposed to what the readers assume to be there.
- Avoid using cliches to express the theme. Although a familiar saying such as “Honesty is the best policy” may seem appropriate, the use of a cliche often suggests that the reader has not thought very deeply about communicating the theme effectively to others. You are encouraged to be ORIGINAL in communicating your ideas.
- Try to imply consequences or effects in your theme to strengthen your wording. It is very important, however, to include those actually reflected in the story’s outcome. See the example given below.
- There is more than one way to state the theme of the story. However, it must still meet the conditions indicated above.
- An insensitive, impatient person often finds it difficult to listen to and understand others’ opinions and may find himself/herself trapped in a world of isolation.
- Insensitivity to others may lead to loneliness.
Avoid doing the following in the introduction:
a) saying “In this paper, I will.. .” or “The purpose of this essay is to.. .” – Where is the creativity? b) using a dictionary or encyclopedia definition. Look up a term if you need to, but be assured the marker is aware of the definition and does not need to be reminded of it. c) repeating yourself and babbling. Get to the point. d) asking questions. They show a lack of confidence and your inability to actually make a statement. e) “Dawn of man” beginnings. “Since the beginning of time (history, etc.).. .” This is too broad. f) praising the author. Commenting on the writer’s “excellent play” typically shows the marker that you cannot think of something better to say. It also appears to be “sucking up” to the marker; it does not work.
Ways to catch the reader’s interest:
a) discuss a historical connection after your general statement about the topic. Be sure you know specific details about the particular event before doing this. b) use an anecdote or narrative to begin the essay. You should begin in the middle of the action and make it descriptive. c) make a surprising or shocking statement about the subject or character after your general statement about the topic. E.g. People with a lack of willpower may smoke several packages of cigarettes a day. Hamlet would have made an extremely dutiful chain smoker.... d) use a famous quotation (philosophical perhaps) which directly relates to your topic. Indicate the speaker. e) make an analogy (interesting comparison) after your general statement about the topic. E.g. Hamlet to Heathcliff f) describe a scene from a movie, book, or a story after your general statement about the topic.
Do the following in the introduction:
a) have a transition from the historical connection, anecdote, movie scene, etc. connecting it to the text being discussed in the essay. E.g. Similarly, William Shakespeare’s play, Hamlet , shows that.... b) introduce the text you are going to discuss in the essay (use italics on computer/ underline title of major work/ use quotation marks for shorter work) c) imply consequences in your theme in the thesis statement d) use the author’s full name ; for the rest of the essay, typically refer to author/director by last name e) know the proper genre of the work (film, short story, modern play, novel, etc.)
Before proceeding, review how to properly express the theme of a literary piece (see theory notes for details).
B. The Body Paragraphs
- each body paragraph should develop some aspect of the thesis statement.
- deal with the ideas mentioned in the identical order given in the thesis statement.
- each paragraph needs a topic sentence, supporting details and examples, and finally, a closing statement.
- each topic sentence should do the following:
- clearly relate to the thesis statement.
- connect itself to the paragraph above it (using transitions) to give the essay coherence (a smooth and logical transition between paragraphs).
- there are several ways to connect paragraphs: a) refer to the preceding paragraph in the topic sentence e.g. In addition to suffering emotionally like Macduff, Lady Macbeth also experiences physical consequences as a result of taking risks.
other reference sources. This evidence can take the form of direct quotations, specific details , etc..
**- using quotations to enhance details is effective, but remember not to give an excessive amount of them. Carefully selecting quotations to be used strengthens an essay while including several quotations (of varying significance) will weaken your essay.
*** - always introduce quotations given, explain the meaning of it by placing it in context, and discuss the significance of each one.
- on a research paper, you will also need to cite other information indicating the page number and other details whenever you give a quotation in the essay.
C. The Conclusion
- Your first step is to REWORD YOUR THESIS STATEMENT in your first sentence.
- In the next few sentences, you can do a variety of things: a) Make predictions and further comments based on the material in the body of the essay (natural extensions of information already discussed). b) Use a famous quotation. c) Call the reader to action (recommend changes, actions, strategies, etc.) to improve the situation. d) End where you began. This is referred to as “echoing” or “framing”; it picks up on an idea/image suggested in the introduction. E.g. You can refer back to an anecdote given in the first paragraph (e.g. Hamlet being a chain smoker with no willpower) and show how it is still relevant or how it could be different. You could provide a solution to the problem you have raised. Symmetry is achieved with this technique.
- End with a parting thought (relate your comment to society, the future, the world, etc.).
Avoid the following:
- repeating other statements made in the introduction (exception: reworded thesis statement). - introducing new ideas or summarizing the essay’s key points.
- using, “in summary” or “in conclusion.”
- writing less than three sentences.
- contradicting your thesis statement.
e.g. The characters of Dallas, Ponyboy, and Johnny show how taking risks may lead to immense physical and emotional suffering. The internal pain each experiences leaves a scar which cannot be removed and directly relates to their actions in the novel. Each
copes differently with risks taken, but only one manages to achieve some success. People will continue to undertake dangerous feats, but they must be prepared to suffer the consequences of their actions.
PROOF READ YOUR ESSAY FOR ANY WRITING ERRORS (see “Writing Style”) and use a THESAURUS to improve your word choices.
WRITING STYLE
Avoid doing the following: (exceptions apply if a direct quotation is used)
a) using the words, “a lot,” “said,” “good,” and “bad” (use a thesaurus!) b) starting sentences with “And,” “But,” or “Because”
- only “Because” is acceptable if done correctly: e.g. Because Jack loved her, he chose to sacrifice his life for hers. c) using “and,” “but,” or “because” more than once in the same sentence d) using the wording, “is because” e) using “so” improperly
- correct - so fast, so hot, so unfair
- incorrect - I was late so I waited outside.
- better - I was late and therefore I waited outside.
- this word is used excessively in students’ writing and usually improperly f) using “it’s” when you need a possessive
- it’s – short for “it is”
- its – possessive form e.g. Give the dog its food. g) confusing possessives with plurals
- incorrect - Many cow’s were in the field.
- correct - Many cows were in the field. h) confusing “there/ they’re/ their”
- There were many people at school.
- They’re late for class.
- I was there at lunch.
- I went to their home. i) ending paragraphs and essays with “in conclusion” (frequently used – be more original) j ) using questions (ANYWHERE in the paragraph or the essay!) k) referring to yourself in any way (unless it is an informal essay)
- incorrect - I believe...
- I think...
- We... l) using the words, “you,” “our,” and “we” in your writing (use “people,” “person,”
has had had had
Do the following:
a) show planning (key-hole essay outline for example) b) use possessives correctly
- Francois’ hat
- Shakespeare’s work c) write out words for numbers 10 and under
- 4 - four d) place a comma before “because”
- see comma rules (you will be given additional rules) e) write in one verb tense f) introduce all quotations, note each, and explain the importance of each one g) make sure you do not repeat yourself — be concise instead of looking for more than one way of saying the same thing
- Canada and the United States are both unique. There are many characteristics which make them different.
- better — Canada and the United States have many characteristics which make them unique.
h) underline or italicize titles of major works; use quotation marks for titles of short works (poems, essays, and short stories) i) check for unity and coherence in your sentences. Ensure all sentences are on the topic assigned and re-check to be sure that your sentences flow from one idea to the next. Link your sentences together so they do not appear to be choppy and disjointed. j) avoid three-sentence paragraphs in the essay. They are often inadequately developed. Remember, a paragraph must have at least three sentences in it in order to count it as a paragraph. k) take time to create an interesting introduction and conclusion. Make your essay stand out from the crowd! l) refer to the author’s full name or last name (not first name by itself) m) recognize the genre the text belongs to (play, short story, etc.) n) PROOF READ FOR ERRORS AND REVISE YOUR ESSAY!
**If writing an essay on a computer, always print out a sheet with planning or a first copy. Make revisions on a draft copy by hand. Place revisions on the computer and then print out a final copy.
Quotations
- provide an excellent source of proof for any points made in the essay.
Methods of Introducing Quotations:
- there are four basic methods of introducing quotations (with the final method being the most challenging). Note the punctuation which follows each introduction: 1. Basic Method: e.g. Tom shouted to Scot, “You’ll regret what you said to me!” e.g. The poet wrote, “The autumn sun has withered.” 2. Line, Phrase, or Quotation Introduction: e.g. The line, “The autumn sun has withered,” conveys the narrator’s loss of hope. e.g. The phrase, “The grey sky,” connotes that the narrator is feeling depressed. e.g. The quotation, “The autumn sun has withered,” conveys the narrator’s loss of hope. 3. The Following Quotation Introduction: e.g. In the following quotation, the poet stresses the narrator’s loss of hope: “The autumn sun has withered.” e.g. The poet stresses the narrator’s loss of hope in the following quotation: “The autumn sun has withered.”
****4. Embedded Quotation** (including the quotation in a sentence of your own): e.g. Unfortunately, “[t]he autumn sun has withered” for the narrator. ( Note: the [] brackets have been used since the capital T had to be replaced with a small one.) e.g. Scot knows that he “will regret what [he] said to [Tom]” the day of the track meet. (Note: the [] brackets have been used since the pronouns in the original quotation do not work in this sentence and consequently have been replaced.)
e.g. A commoner explains, Truly, sir, all that I live by is with the awl: I meddle with no tradesman's matters, nor women's matters; but with awl. I am, indeed, sir, a surgeon to old shoes; when they are in great danger, I recover them. (Shakespeare, I, i, 22-26)
Remember that quotation marks indicate exact quotations.
- If you depart for any reason from the author's exact words, you must indicate that you have done so (place outside of quotation marks).
Use three spaced dots (an ellipsis) to indicate that you have omitted one or
more words. A fourth dot is needed, for the period, if the omitted material
comes at the end of a sentence. The ellipsis does not need to be used in front or at the end
of a quotation when using method #4 only. Otherwise, it needs to be used.
Use square brackets ([]) to indicate that you have added or substituted
something to make the meaning clearer.
- This method is used usually if introducing quotations with method #4 when integrating the grammar of your quotation into the grammar of your sentence.
When incorporating a quotation within a quotation , use double quotation marks
to enclose the entire quotation and single quotation marks to enclose any
quotations within it, or vice versa.
e.g. Emily Bronte writes, "He... wrenched open the lattice, bursting... into an uncontrollable passion of tears. ‘Come in! Come in!’ he sobbed” (Bronte 78).
Indicate clearly the source of your quotation (refer to “In-text Citation” —
MLA format).
In-Text Citation
- Whenever you use a quotation or paraphrased idea from another source in the body of your essay, you need to cite the author and page from which you got the quotation or idea. Place the author’s last name and page number (for a Shakespearean play, cite the act, scene, and line numbers instead) in parentheses at the end of the sentence containing the quotation or idea.
E.g. (Assume the following sentences appear within one of the body paragraphs)
King Lear, in anger, proclaims, “Let it be so! Thy truth then be thy dower!” (Shakespeare I, i, 111). He reacts strongly to his youngest daughter’s answer as to how much she loves her father. He reflects how deeply she has hurt him in the following quotation: Here I disclaim all my paternal care, Propinquity and property of blood, And as a stranger to my heart and me Hold thee from this for ever.... (Shakespeare I, i, 115-119) He has disowned Cordelia in terms of disallowing her rightful inheritance and removing her from his now stone-cold heart. He wishes for her to be “out of [his] sight” forever more (Shakespeare I, i, 164). Lear becomes “imprisoned in the world he has made” (Knights 102). His other two daughters will force him to abide by their decisions to achieve ultimate control over their father and the country. He will live to regret his impulsive decision later when his two daughters destroy what remains of his world and beliefs.
- Notice the following in the previous example: - the present tense (verb tense) has been maintained throughout it - quotations have been noted (three from the text itself and one from a critic) - quotations have been introduced (in various ways) and have been explained. - the square brackets used in the second last quotation indicate that the word, “his,” has been substituted for “my” (in the original quotation) - the paragraph does not end with a quotation — an appropriate closing sentence is provided
