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RESILIENCE Question NAIRE score RESILIENCE Question NAIRE score
How resilient are you?
This is an abbreviated version of the Nicholson McBride Resilience Questionnaire (NMRQ). For each question, score yourself between 1 and 5, where 1 = strongly disagree and 5 = strongly agree. Be honest: understanding the specific areas in which you lack resilience will enable you to get the most out of our 10 point booster plan.
Resilience Questionnaire Score
- In a difficult spot, I turn at once to what can be done to put things right.
- I influence where I can, rather than worrying about what I can’t influence.
- I don’t take criticism personally.
- I generally manage to keep things in perspective.
- I am calm in a crisis.
- I’m good at finding solutions to problems.
- I wouldn’t describe myself as an anxious person.
- I don’t tend to avoid conflict.
- I try to control events rather than being a victim of circumstances.
- I trust my intuition.
- I manage my stress levels well.
- I feel confident and secure in my position.
TOTAL
Your score
A developing
level or
resilience. Your
score indicates
that, although
you may not
always feel at
the mercy of
events, you
would in fact
benefit
significantly
from developing
aspects of your
behaviour.
An established
level of
resilience. Your
score indicates
that you may
occasionally
have tough
days when you
can’t quite
make things go
your way, but
you rarely feel
ready to give
up.
A strong level
of resilience.
Your above-
average score
indicates that
you are pretty
good at rolling
with the
punches and
you have an
impressive
track record of
turning
setbacks into
opportunities.
An exceptional
level of
resilience. Your
score indicates
that you are
very resilient
most of the time
and rarely fail to
bounce back –
whatever life
throws at you.
You believe in
making your
own luck.
I am the victim of my personal history – Your past must have an impact, but is no excuse for not improving yourself now. There’s so much to do it’s not even worth trying – Life is complex, and you now have to do more with less. As a result, you may come to believe there are simply so many imperatives that you can’t se where to start. Psychologists call this ‘agglomeration’ – feeling overwhelmed by the volume and complexity of the issues. Break the problem down, establish priorities and take first things first. You only get one shot – Occasionally this may be the case, but not often – especially in circumstances where even the experts can’t predict the right way to go. It then becomes a question of trial and error, always being alert to the worst-case scenario and unintended consequences. There’s a right answer to everything – Analysts dream that by scrutinising data hard enough, the ‘correct’ answer will emerge. This rarely happens in real life. The danger is that analysis becomes a substitute for, rather than a prelude to, action. I’m on my own – It’s easy to believe that you are the only one suffering and that you have to weather the storm alone. The old adage ‘a problem shares is a problem halved’ works well in these circumstances; talking things through is a source of strength, not a sign of weakness. This isn’t fair – Doctors claim that perpetrators of crimes heal more quickly than their victims. More generally, if you believe you have in some way contributed to a problem, you may feel more motivated to resolve it. If you are not to blame you tend to dwell on the unfairness of the situation rather than on what can be done.
Slip these drag anchors by reframing. Recognise when your thinking is negative and immediately turn it around so that it becomes positive.
- Become more optimistic Optimism is one of the most important characteristics of resilient people; it is vitally important to look on the bright side, have confidence in your own abilities, and salvage what you can from problematic situations. Even those who lean towards the glass-half-empty mindset can learn.
- Manage stress Psychologists see stress as an energising force – up to a point, beyond which it becomes debilitating. Highly resilient people have a higher tipping point and, when things threaten to get them down, they know how to deal with it. Sources of stress are unique to you: to boost your resilience, you need to identify what your stressors are and how to counteract them. There are also personality traits that make some individuals more stress-prone. Look at the list below. If you tend towards any of these, discipline yourself to reduce or eliminate them:
Displaying hostility Hiding feelings Being unable to listen properly Being over-perfectionist Having difficulty relaxing Being generally critical
Stress management falls into 2 categories – distraction and resolution. Distraction techniques include exercise, breathing deeply, walking or extracting yourself from the situation. Resolution is focused on solving the problem.
- Improve decision-making Resilience requires you to make rather than avoid decisions. Resilient people trust their own judgement, but aren’t afraid to challenge their minds. They know that decisions are rarely irreversible and that procrastination is the enemy of resilience. Understanding your preferred decision-making approach is a critical step towards building resilience. Tips for shifting your style are given below.
Becoming more intuitive – Build experience – understand your decision-making shortcuts
- trust your gut – establish the worst-case scenario – take a risk – learn Becoming more rational – Stand back/don’t rush to judgement – gather data – talk to the relevant parties – establish criteria – use a rational process – ‘sense check’ the answer
- Ask for help You don’t have to do this alone; resilient people know when to reach out to others – and who is best to turn to. Do you have this strength of network? If not, map it out. Draw a circle on a sheet of paper – this is you. Draw your network, with others depicted as circles too: the more important they are to you, the larger the circle; the stronger the relationship, the closer they are to you. Draw lines linking you to others and others to one another, dotted lines for indirect relationships. Consider what you want from them and what you can offer and add this to the map. What actions do you need to take to get and give support?
- Deal with conflict Conflict occurs when our views differ from those of another person – so we have to deal with conflict every day. The ability to handle it constructively is an important part of resilience – ensuring that the style of resolution is appropriate, given the nature of the conflict and the other party. The ‘Conflict Resolution’ panel below gives examples and suggested tactics.
Nature of problem Possible approach Although I’m annoyed, it’s a trivial matter This is one to let drop – get over it. My solution is better than the other person’s but their approach could work.
It’s not worth fighting over. Win credit for your flexibility. This is important, something that requires a well-though-through solution. I have strong views but so does the other person.
Honest, constructive talking and listening. Collaborate to find a solution acceptable to both parties. I’m convinced I’m right and the other person is wrong.
Use your powers of influence and persuasion. Sell the benefits of your idea or say it’s the way it has to be – but in a way that preserves your relationship.
- Learn Thinking regularly about what lessons can drawn from your experience strengthens your ‘learning muscle’ and helps you build resilience. Figure out how you learn best and take the most from the experiences life throws at you.
- Be yourself You may be determined to enhance your resilience but you won’t succeed if your plan for doing this offends your core identity and values. The most resilient leaders are as self- aware as they are self-confident!
