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NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION
Nonverbal communication: an applied approach
CAP 1 - NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION ORIGINS
Communication is a primary social process -> allows us to signal a variety of things to one another -> allows groups of creatures (human and nonhuman) to navigate a complex environment
Human communications: most complicated forms of messaging (use a system of established rule-driven strategies)
Messaging can be subtle: from indicating interest to avoiding interaction, a variety of verbal and nonverbal messages help us to move throughout our social world
Models of communication
Everyone has a similar shared understanding of the basic models of communication
Linear Model of Communication
Shannon & Weaver: linear model of communication Focuses on the transmission of a verbal or nonverbal message to another person -> one way transmission (unidirectional messaging) Sender: process of encoding (converting his thoughts into a specific message) Channels: by what the message is sent Receiver: target person to whom the message is sent, which decode the meaning from the message, trying to understand the intent of the sender Context: the setting in which communication occurs (physical location, time and social situation wherein messaging happens) -> influence both the creation and the transmission of the message Noise: any barriers to hearing or understanding that detract from the successful transmission of a message
- Physical noise : physical sound that stops you from perceiving a message
- Psychological noise : a mental state that distracts someone from correctly understanding a message
- Physiological noise : a receiver’s physical state (like hunger or sleepiness) that interrupt his or her ability to decode a message
- Semantic noise : may include a situation where individuals don’t understand these symbols that are being used in the message due to specific words or pronunciations
Transactional Model of Communication
Most of our communication is not one-side communication -> In most situations, people are sending messages at the same time to each other, with each person serving as both a sender and a receiver of messages throughout the interaction
Transactional model of communication Add the concept of feedback: is the verbal and nonverbal responses that someone gives in reaction to a message that they are receiving (a set of responses that influence future messaging)
-> transactional messaging: people take on roles as both sender and receiver at the same time, with messages and feedback being sent and received simultaneously throughout most communication interactions
Defining nonverbal communication
Verbal communication : the verbal content of a message (word used are really important in a communication), BUT can have a critical impact on people, places and things with which we interact -> important to make sure the words that we use convey the messages that we hope they convey.
At the same time, much of what we don’t say is just as important (gestures, facial expressions, tov…)
Nonverbal communication : any communicative characteristic or behavior that intentionally or unintentionally conveys a message without the use of verbal language -> intentional or not, because we are not always aware of our communicative behaviors when we send a message People may just as easily take note of the nonverbal messages that you hoped would never be seen
Why isn’t ASL considered nonverbal?
ASL = American Sign Language (Lis = Lingua Italiana Segni)
ASL is a system of language that is communicated through gesture; -> Even though no words are audibly spoken, hand gestures and facial expressions combine to send specific and discrete language-based messages. Not all verbal messages are necessarily vocal/auditory messages, as we can use verbal communication to visually send messages through the written word or through the interpretation of specific gestures used in sign language. These signs are considered verbal communication because each sign has a direct verbal meaning attached to the sign, one that is codified and made formal much in the same way that languages are formed and acquired throughout a culture
Non verbal communication primacy
Nonverbal communication is so important to human interaction: has represented many important firsts for individuals, for interpersonal interactions and even for the species as whole -> describe nonverbal communication as having primacy -> we typically pay attention to nonverbal messages first and foremost in an interaction
Primacy of Species
Humans’ early ancestors were not able to use verbal language (language began with homo sapiens, maybe Neanderthal vocalized something) BUT primates were able to live in communities and share the division of labor -> NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION like like grunts or slight vocalizations were likely the early auditory forms of communication, and facial expressions or gestures may have been able to indicate important things like danger or submission or even the presence of spoiled meat
Phylogenetic primacy : the idea that nonverbal communication came first over the course of our species’ evolution -> ancestors figured out social signaling
With so many different nonverbal and verbal messages present in our daily lives, it is not surprising that we grow increasingly reliant upon certain types of messages over the course of our life span, influenced in part by the interactivity of the channel through which we received that message. Throughout the rest of the book, we will explore specific features and contexts of the nonverbal messages in our daily lives.
CAP 2 - NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION FEATURES
Principles of nonverbal messaging
Burgoon & Paine : characteristics of nonverbal communication
1. Nonverbal messaging is ubiquitous It is everywhere: every interaction contains nonverbal components Even unintended behaviours can be perceived to have some communicative value 2. Nonverbal messaging functions in many ways We can use nonverbal in any situation -> sometimes it occurs alongside the verbal message, other times nonverbal is the sole method of communication 3. Nonverbal messaging is widely used In every culture and every location people use nv.c. to send messages -> facial expressions are near universal: people understand some common nonverbal messages regardless of their background While not every nonverbal message translates well across cultures or locations, many facial expressions are similar across cultures. In addition, many gestures are directly related to the things that they represent, so the meaning is likely similar among most people. 4. Nonverbal messaging impacts meaning-making Nonverbal messages can add great significance to an interaction -> can also inadvertently send a message other than the one intended While nonverbal behaviors can add to one’s understanding of an intended message, it can also lead to someone being still further confused about a sender’s intent, sometimes even with dramatic results 5. Nonverbal messaging has primacy Nv is a “first” for us in many ways: - first way that we learned to communicate as a species (phylogenetic primacy) - first way that we learned to communicate across our individual life span (ontogenetic primacy) - first way that we continue to learn information about other through first impressions (interactional primacy) Nv.c. has primacy by coming before verbal communication 6. Nonverbal messaging is ambiguous Ambiguity across nv. behaviours can be useful in certain situations Occasionally, people may want to send a message that can’t (or shouldn’t) be put into words. In those cases, nonverbal behaviors offer an opportunity to get a message across without the sender being held accountable for the verbal content that would have replaced that message
7. Nonverbal messaging is accepted People trust nv.c. over the verbal messages because: - primacy of nv. channels of communication - people know that nv can be used to send information that one would prefer to remain off the record This reliance on the nonverbal components of an overall interaction is one reason why sarcasm works so effectively: The nonverbal messages occur alongside the verbal statements, and the facial expressions or tone of voice serve to negate the words or phrases that are spoken by the messenger
Digital vs analog representation
Distinction between verbal and nonverbal behaviours, which has to do with the distinction between digital representation and analog representation during interactions
Digital representation: the components of the message have an arbitrary relationship to the thing that is being signified. This arbitrary relationship is assigned by cultural experience, much in the same way that a specific set of letters are put together to form a word that is then assigned to represent a concept -> verbal messages: they consist of a string of symbolic letters and sounds that have come to represent a specific concept
Analog representation: there is a direct link between the message and the thing being signified -> nonverbal messages: one need not have much cultural background to gain a solid impression what message a skilled communicator is trying to convey
Message processing
Message processing : ability to successfully send or receive nonverbal messages, which is the combination of encoding and decoding messages in human interaction
Once the message is encoded, it is sent through a channel to the receiver, who then begins the process of trying to interpret meaning from a communication act or behavior. The receiver then begins decoding the message received, in an attempt to understand or act upon the verbal or nonverbal messages received = stages of communication
Three-stage model of nonverbal message processing explains how humans are able to successfully receive messages from one another
1. The attention stage
In order for someone to receive a message from an interaction partner, first they must be attending to that partner, a behavior that occurs during the attention stage -> listen and observe while engaging with another person -> the ability to screen out any distractions requires a great deal of mental energy, and only when one is intentionally giving attention to a communicator can they then begin to receive verbal or nonverbal messages Sex difference: women are more likely to give attention to nv. messages -> quite engaging, with people able to use gestures, vocal variety, direct eye contact, and kinesic movements to re-engage an audience that appears to be losing interest quickly
2. The comprehension stage
Some specific caveats are also highlighted in those principles, pointing out that nonverbal messaging functions in many ways, nonverbal messaging impacts meaning-making, and nonverbal messaging is ambiguous. Lastly, it’s important to remember the final principle: nonverbal messaging has primacy. One characteristic that helps in that primacy is the direct nature of nonverbal representation; rather than being digital and therefore arbitrarily related, nonverbal communication is analogic and has a direct relationship to the thing it represents. Finally, we turn our attention to considering the ways that individuals process nonverbal information, highlighting the importance of active attention in human interaction.
CAP 3 - IDENTITY AND THE NONVERBAL CODES
Managing identities
Identity: describes the relatively unchanging or stable set of perceptions or ideas that we hold about ourselves ( who we think we are)
Sex & Gender
One of the primary identities that emerges; is our perceptions of how we do or don’t fit into traditional sex roles
Over time, we develop an understanding about a variety of nonverbal characteristics that help us to act out a gender identity including how much space we take up in public, whether we act tough or accept needed help, the types of clothes we wear, and even the facial expressions we allow ourselves to show to both known and unknown others and (even) gender rules imposed when we were child (es. men don’t cry)
Sex: defined in biological terms, this includes genital, chromosomal, and hormonal displays of maleness and femaleness
Gender: a culturally defined understanding of what social behaviors are generally believed to be representations of masculinity, femininity, or both ( androgynous ), or neither ( undifferentiated )
The Ethics of Personal Pronouns: In the English language, we often use gendered pronouns to describe the actions of another person (ex. he/she), BUT in most situations, it is not appropriate to guess the gender identity of an unknown other despite a variety of nonverbal displays that may hint at a particular gendered life -> An important best practice to be adopted by a skilled communicator is to simply ask someone what pronoun they use. Rather than asking them what pronoun they prefer—which implies that there is a “real” pronoun that should be used but isn’t— simply asking someone about their pronouns is easy and much less awkward than someone might assume
Race
Race heritage: often "displayed" for others to see before other impressions are given (ex. skin or hair color) -> there isn’t ANY biological basis for many stereotypes associated with racial heritage -> Many people have to live their lives while dealing with unfair judgments about how they act, who they are, or what they believe (as opposite, “white privilege” or “male privilege”)
Culture
Culture: the combination of the various groups to which we belong.
In addition, those groups are often located within a particular geographic region, where local ways of doing things can emerge that influence individual identity beyond members’ other group memberships
Personality
Every person has its own way to navigate the world based upon its own personality
ex. Extrovert: get their energy from social interaction, exhibiting direct eye contact, an open body orientation and smiles Introvert : opposite as extrovert, making themselves appear smaller and unapproachable, unwelcome facial expression and repeated glances at a watch
Other identities
There are many other aspects of individual experience with which people may identify (ex. athlete, member of a band, attracted by the same/opposite sex…)
-> A variety of interests and activities may influence your sense of self to varying degrees; for some people, they may so strongly identify with something that their world almost seems to revolve around it, while you may have never spent any time giving that topic a second thought
Identity, relationships and nonverbal codes
People often send messages about their own personal identities using nonverbal messaging. When people send nonverbal messages to one another, they may do so in a variety of ways (ex. voice, eye contact, facial expression, clothing, time management skills..) -> each behaviour falls under different nonverbal codes
Prominent nonverbal codes
Although people typically use multiple codes at the same time when sending messages to one another, it is useful to separately consider each of the nine major nonverbal codes
Kinesics (cap. 4)
Kinesics: deals with movement and motion-based behaviour
- facial expressions
- illustrative gestures
- motion-based ways of regulating conversational flow
- additional forms of communicating that use movement (ex. leg-jiggling)
Occasionally people unintentionally convey messages that they are antsy or stressed using motion (ex. tapping one leg, braiding hairs…)
Proxemics (cap. 5)
Proxemics : involves communicating through the use of personal space and interpersonal distance -> each person has acquired their own slightly different understanding of personal space, based upon their own cultural background and experiences
Some common factors that influence our sense of self include our sex and gender, our race, our individual personality characteristics, and the various cultures in which we find ourselves. Nonverbal codes can help convey these identities, with a large range of behaviors and characteristics serving as messages across a variety of channels and senses. Each of the nonverbal codes serves as a category of nonverbal behaviors that are grouped based upon some common characteristics, and these codes often co-occur with one another. Kinesics focuses on the use of motion in communication, whether through gestures or even the motion associated with making affect displays (e.g., facial expressions). Proxemics deals with personal space and the distances we normally interact apart from each other. Haptics, on the other hand, focuses on the closest use of space, that of touch across a variety of personal and professional contexts. The study of oculesic messages focus on various forms of communication using one’s eyes, while vocalics focus on the wide variety of vocal/auditory sounds we can make to send a message. Physical appearance highlights how the ways we look and the clothing and artifacts we keep with our body may send messages to those around us. Environmental features serve to constrain or encourage a variety of communication patterns based upon cultural norms, hinting at rules of appropriateness for both topic and manner of communication. Finally, olfactics focuses on how smells communicate information, and chronemics highlights how the use of time can also communicate information to the people with whom we interact. Looking at the complete list of nonverbal communication codes, one is struck by the incredible complexity of messaging that occurs within human contexts. Indeed, everyone has a lot of information to sift through in order to best understand each person with whom they interact and the unique identities that each person represents.
CAP 4 - KINESICS: ENGAGING MOTION AND GESTURES
Kinesics
Kinesics : nonverbal code that focuses on movements and motion-based behaviours (no verbal language) -> Family: social structure through which we learn our earliest and most significant forms of communication (both verbal and nonverbal) -> infants use nonverbal communication
Intermodal matching : cognitive process of integrating information from different senses
Communication, movement and the face
People can communicate a wide range of messages through their faces, using muscles and eyes
We are naturally programmed to notice when someone is engaging in gaze behaviours (the pattern of eye-movements and directions of gaze (sguardo) used to gather informations, communicate nonverbally and coordinate actions)
Affect display
Affect display: each facial expression is a way to reveal an internal emotion in a public manner (affect = emotion) -> most commonly discussed emotional displays: happiness, sadness, fear, anger, surprise, disgust
People understand facial expressions of other people because of their characteristic facial cues:
- Happiness : smiling and raiders cheeks
- Sadness : eyebrows raised and drawn together, lips with depressed corners
- Fear : raised eyebrows and eyelids, stretched lips and open mouth
- Anger : low eyebrows, raised eyelids, tight raised upper lip and depressed lower lip, open mouth
- Surprise : head upward, raised eyebrows and eyelids, eyes moved down, dropped jaw
- Disgust : raised chin, wrinkled nose, upper lip raised, open mouth and tongue sticking out
Neurocultural theory
Universal position : the ability to produce and recognize facial expressions is a product of biology Cultural relativist position: the ability to produce and recognize facial expressions is a product of culture -> for a long time, scholars argued that (gli studiosi hanno sostenuto che) these affect displays were actually a combination of our innate biologically based on inherited behaviours and our culture-specific learned behaviours
Neurocultural theory: we have inherited a basic understanding of how to display emotion that is instinctual -> emotions displayed are filtered through our learned cultural display rules , that tell us how we are supposed to display emotion -> These display rules can lead us to reduce the expression of a certain emotion, exaggerate it so that others believe we feel it more strongly than we really do, or even replace it with a completely different emotion.
Flat affect : not show any emotion at all
Together, these factors explain how human facial expressions of emotion are shaped by both cultural and biological influences, allowing us to navigate complex social situations
Eye contact : can enhance emotional expression, in a way that subtly alters their meaning -> our eye contact (or lack thereof) can add an additional layer of meaning to the affect displays that we use in our interactions
Ekman & Friesen’s microexpressions
According to the Neurocultural Theory, our innate biology may trigger our facial muscles to express a certain emotion, while our cultural background can modify that expression—by amplifying, reducing, or even replacing it entirely
Microexpressions (Ekman & Friesen): there is a microexpression or brief flash of emotion on each individual’s face that occurs between the moment that we begin to display our innate emotion and that we begin to override that emotional display into something more culturally appropriate. This “flash” of emotions is incredibly fast, just a fraction of a second, but scholars argue that we can subconsciously become aware of this microexpression and register it in our interactions with other people
Social signaling
Why do humans develop the ability to express emotions?
1. Open body orientation: indicates an openness or willingness to engage and interact with that person (your body directly at the body of an interaction partner) 2. Closed body orientation : highlights less desire to interact with another person, or even lack of time to truly engage on another
People may turn their faces toward a potential interaction partner without actually displaying an open body orientation. In this case, people often give off the impression that the partner may have their attention, but that they should keep their interaction brief or that the interaction is generally unwanted
Summary: Kinesics - engaging motion and gestures
Movements of the hands, body, or face offer a unique channel for messaging, as these kinesic behaviors are among our earliest attempts at communication with others. For most people, the family unit is the first experience with engaging in communication behaviors, as we learn how to engage in affect displays from interacting with our family members, even as we begin to develop an understanding of how our culture wants us to override our biological urges to communicate our internal feelings in an appropriate way. Indeed, our facial expressions (especially when combined with our use of eye contact and other eye-related movement) are among the most powerful ways to send messages to other people, forming one of the earliest types of social signaling. Add to that the range of gestures and positioning that we produce as social information with our hands and body, and we begin to see the complex ways that he have developed a greater understanding of how best to navigate our social world using motion-based messaging.
CAP 5 - PROXEMICS: ENGAGING PERSONAL SPACE AND INTERPERSONAL DISTANCE
Proxemics
Proxemics : the use of personal space and interpersonal distance -> each person has a slightly different understanding of their own personal space, based upon their own culture -> there is a near-universal understanding about the fact that each culture has its own understanding of some distance that is considered “good manner” (esiste una comprensione quasi universale del fatto che ogni cultura ha la propria idea di quale distanza sia considerata educata)
Edward T. Hall : four different classifications of approximate interaction distances. Each category includes the amount of space between two people, and has implications for the likely nature of the relationship between two people interacting in those spaces.
1. Intimate zone (from 0 to 18 inches) Where we only allow our closest interpersonal relationships and relatively few individuals are allowed to enter -> we are aware of every aspect of the other interactant -> allows each person to have Kinesthetic awareness of each other (to fill on other’s sense) 2. Personal/casual zone (from 18 inch to 4 feet) Close friends and family members, distance with people we feel comfortable with or even people that we know quite well -> degree of trust -> like an egg-shaped bubble surrounding each person
3. Social/consultative zone (from 4 to 8 feet) Interact with others in a variety of professional or acquaintance-based contexts (workplace conversations, extended social circle in a public setting) -> this distance is not arbitrary -> keeping someone at “arm’s length” 4. Public zone (from 8 feet to infinity) Most comfortable space to keep unknown others with no professional obligations (strangers)
We only allow certain people into certain zones, based upon our preexisting relationship with them
Relationship : may influence the proxemic zone but proxemic distance may also influence your evaluation of your relationship with other person
If you have a positive attitude toward someone and they interact more closely than you otherwise expected, this may cause you to subconsciously reevaluate your relationship with that person and decide that you are closer than you had previously thought
Proxemic violations
Proxemic violations: when someone invades another person’s personal space, it usually causes a physical reaction (like increased alertness) and makes people form an opinion about the person who did it
Expectancy Violation Theory: people can use personal space violations to influence the outcome of their interactions with others. To be sure, there may be cases of positive violations within positive relationships for positive reasons, but that may not always be the norm
Physiological Arousal
If someone comes closer than they should, our brains— from an evolutionary point of view— are wired to quickly decide how to respond -> effects of physiological arousal may not be immediately apparent to our interaction partners
These biological and emotional responses to violations of personal space probably affect how we interact with others in that moment. However, these feelings and reactions are often subtle and may only be noticed by the person who is experiencing the physiological arousal
Perceptions and expectancy violations theory
When an individual behaves in a manner other than what we expect, we immediately become physiologically aroused and then try to make sense of that fight-or-flight feeling
Judee Burgoon : the ways that these violations can impact our perceptions of our interaction partners
- We all have expectations about normal social distances upon our cultural norms and also based upon our known “ idiosyncrasies ” or individual patterns of behaviour of our interaction partner
- Knowing that someone is similar to yourself helps to reduce uncertainty about how that person will act in a variety of situations, rather than trying to predict attitudes -> we assume that a person who seem similar to yourself, probably will likely to behave in the same way you’d behave in that situation
- As humans, we are motivated to reduce unknown information about other people. Choosing to spend time with people who seem similar gives people a simple way to quickly reduce uncertainty about otherwise unknown others, an assumption of similarity which may or may not necessarily be legitimate
- The third explanation has to do with the affirmation that we often receive from interacting with people who have those similar attitudes. When we engage and discuss with people who are similar to ourselves, they may affirm many of our related (or unrelated) life choices and preferences
Difference
Related to the degree to which individuals see one another as complementing the values, beliefs, behaviour or aspirations of each other.
Complementary: related to one individual exhibiting traits or behaviour that the other either does not or cannot exhibit, or to being particularly gifted in one area that the other sees himself as lacking
Although difference is not necessarily always noticeable and does not function as a specific nonverbal code, there are many characteristics of nonverbal communication that people use to determine whether someone is more or less similar to themselves (ex. attributes of physical appearance help guess the personality or sociodemographic characteristics)
Proximity
Proximity : physical distance from one person to another, related directly to the proxemic code -> we are attracted with people whom we share the same physical space
Possible explanations:
- Mere exposure effect: a situation that emerges when an individual is more likely to be attracted to things that they see frequently, relative to those things that are rarely or never seen. As we interact with individuals multiple times, we may make assumptions about those individuals, specifically that they are very much like ourselves
- As we seek to reduce the uncertainty about others that surround us, communication becomes one of the best ways to figure out the attitudes, values, and beliefs of those that surround us If we are indeed motivated to reduce uncertainty about people we are likely to meet again, then those individuals we have interacted with multiple times in our personal space are probably the ones most likely to feature once again in our daily experience
Humans are quick to characterize individuals who do not behave in a typical or expected manner as “different.”
Schemata: the development of the understanding of how a person fit into our classification (schemata) of how we see ourselves
Interestingly, sometimes we change our nonverbal behaviors to be more or less like another person, perhaps trying to seem more similar to a desirable other person, or even to make it clear that we are in a different social grouping than the person with whom we find ourselves interacting. The ways that we interact with others is highly influenced by the ways that we see ourselves, and our identity is a strong predictor of our nonverbal and verbal communication behaviors
Summary - Proxemics: engaging personal space and interpersonal distance
Culture and individual experience both influence the interactional styles of people across the world. Within each culture, there are proxemic norms for how closely or how far apart people should interact, often based upon the preexisting relationship that those individuals have with one another. Expectancy Violation Theory has been developed to describe the complex relationship between personal space, individual experience, and the perceptions that we develop about one another. Interestingly, our use of personal space is based in part upon what draws us toward one another in the first place. People are naturally drawn to interact with and relate to others who seem similar to the self. As discussed in this chapter, however, the nature of relationships is much more complicated. Indeed, people are constantly sending messages of both approach and avoidance to one another based on very subtle nonverbal cues. We can let people know that we are interested in interacting with them from across a crowded room, and at the same time we can stop a relationship from forming before it even starts. As people get more and more fluent in using their nonverbal communication behaviors, they are able to manage friendships, romantic relationships, workplace partnerships, and family interactions with skill and intentionality. The factors influencing our use of personal space are much more complicated than one might initially believe.
CAP 6 - HAPTICS: ENGAGING PHYSICAL CONTACT AND TOUCH
Haptics and human development
Some of the earliest messages that we receive as humans are related to touch
Self-assessments and touch avoidance: not all individuals are likely thrilled with the idea that touch is a necessary part of close relationships. Indeed, it is not uncommon to regularly meet people who are uncomfortable with giving or receiving touch for a variety of reasons
Early influences
From our earliest age, we begin to learn that things are certainly real when we can touch them
The sense of touch helps us to process information about the world around us, and we use touch to explore our environments from the very beginning
In addition, humans are likely to be impacted by the use of touch across a variety of relationships in our social world. Touch can cause bonding and relational escalation (i.e., incremental increases in closeness) to occur and is one of the strongest ways of influencing another person’s behaviors -> cause people to feel connected to one another -> lack of touch can serve as an indicator of emotional detachment
Touch is a significant social force
- positive casual touch can increase personal evaluations even among strangers
Happens when people use touch to bring some fun or inject some humor into a situation. It can also occur when people are trying to indicate that something that they said is not meant to be taken seriously (e.g., sarcasm)
5. Task-related touch Occurs when people use touch necessarily as part of accomplishing some other instrumental task (e.g. dentist, pedicure, hairstylist). Involve someone else touching you—in part, because there is no easy way to accomplish each task without someone else’s physical assistance. 6. Hybrid touch Combines multiple forms of touch listed above into one single interaction. The most commonly experienced combination might be the mixture of ritualistic and positive affect touches (e.g. two best friends reunited after a long time apart)
Diverse attitude toward touch
Different ways of using touch within culture and around the world; NOT everyone touches the same way:
a. Cultural and regional differences (e.g. united states are more likely to express comfort with touch as you move further south and west) b. Sex and gender differences
- Women more likely to avoid the touch of men, but most likely to give and receive touch overall
- Certain places are less accessible to be touched than others, based upon one’s displayed gender and their relationship and gender identity
- Sex differences have recently been highlighted as likely stemming from other cultural rules and norms (e.g. heterosexual men avoid using touch other men, except situations where their masculinity is affirmed in other ways) c. Age differences: older people receive less touch and also use touch in different patterns (than younger people), because they mentally process it differently, BUT they’re more likely to desire touch and less likely to receive it
Touch can be a great way to express closeness, affection, or interest to a loved one or close friend. Importantly, one should always be certain of the nature of the relationship that they have with the person being touched. Unwanted touch is uncomfortable and unacceptable
Concept of affirmative consent highlights the importance of having an interaction—even a brief one—where both partners assent and say “yes” to engaging in physical activity with one another
Affection exchange theory
Affection exchange theory: argues that individuals have developed affectionate behaviors over the course of human history as a way of demonstrating (to a potential partner) that he or she would be a good parent, thus activating the partner’s biological drive to procreate and produce children -> explain a variety of human motivations toward affection while also acknowledging that affection need NOT always be for the purposes of procreation
Kory Floyd : biological components of affection and the impact on human health - he found that individuals generally respond positively to affectionate touch in specific and measurable ways
Diverse attitude toward public displays: cultural differences also influence how comfortable we are with using touch in public
Public displays of affection (or PDAs) vary across cultures in terms of both their acceptability and likelihood among couples. Although much of the cross-cultural research has been done on heterosexual couples, there is reason to believe that cultural norms for these public displays likely impact a variety of relationship structures
Attachment theory
Our earliest experiences with touch may generally impact many of our relationship behaviors throughout the rest of our life.
Attachment Theory argues that the basic patterns of interacting with others established during our infant years (e.g., those beliefs about whether other people treat us well and whether we deserve to be treated well) impact our expectations for future interactions, and even what we expect out of our adult relationships -> claims about how our early experiences with touch and attention as an infant might have influenced our later understanding of who we are and how we relate to others around us -> this theory argues that we receive early signals about our own self-worth and about the ability of others to help us during our earliest experiences with touch as an infant
Attachment Theory posits four main categories of adult attachment based upon early experiences with touch, attention, and having one’s needs met:
- Secure attachments are often characterized by confidence in one’s self and one’s attachment partner. A securely attached individual is likely to believe “I’m okay and you’re okay.”
- Dismissive attachments are characterized by confidence in one’s self but a belief that one’s attachment partner may not be able to meet one’s needs. A dismissively attached individual is likely to believe “I’m okay but you’re not okay.”
- Preoccupied attachments are characterized by a lack of self-worth but a confidence in one’s relational partner. A preoccupied individual is likely to believe “I’m not okay but you’re okay.”
- Fearful-avoidant attachments are characterized by both a lack of self-worth and a lack of confidence in one’s relational partner. A fearful-avoidant individual is likely to believe “I’m not okay and you’re not okay.”
Attachment styles are just one’s natural default toward a relationship during times of stress or discomfort. One can have a completely fulfilling long-term romantic partnership regardless of one’s attachment style.
Additionally, it’s important to note that scholars have found that these attachment styles are actually influenced much more than just by the touch that one receives as an infant; indeed, life experiences and relationship histories may influence one’s current behavior far beyond the early influences of infant touch
Summary - Haptics: engaging physical contact and touch
Human touch is one of the earliest ways that we experience inclusion and affection and it lasts over the course of our lifespan. While there are innumerable types of touch, each touch may serve some social or instrumental function in our lives. There are a variety of responses to touch, and those may be influenced by culture and region and sex and age. Regardless of those characteristics, one of the most important things to remember is that touch
