INSTITUTO DE IDIOMAS – ENGLISH B1 AND B1+
Lic. Karen Loaiza Espinosa
English Teacher
WORKSHOP #5
Objectives:
Students will be able to understand the reasons why people feel insecure and will be able to make suggestions to
overcome it.
Why am I so insecure? What causes insecurity?
There is an internal dialogue that accompanies our feelings of insecurity. This is called the “critical inner
voice.” Dr. Lisa Firestone, who co-authored the book Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice wrote,
“The critical inner voice is formed out of painful early life experiences in which we witnessed or
experienced hurtful attitudes toward us or those close to us. As we grow up, we unconsciously adopt and
integrate this pattern of destructive thoughts toward ourselves and others.”
So, what events or attitudes shape this inner critic? The experiences we have with our influential early
caretakers can be at the root of our insecurity as adults. Imagine a child being yelled at by a parent.
“You’re so spaced out! Can’t you figure anything out on your own?” Then, imagine the negative
comments and attitudes parents express toward themselves. “I look terrible in this. I’m so fat.” These
attitudes don’t even have to be verbalized to influence the child. A parent’s absence can leave children
feeling insecure and believing there is something fundamentally wrong with them. An intrusive parent
can cause children to become introverted or self-reliant in ways that make them feel insecure or
untrusting of others.
The Effect of Insecurity
It’s clear that there are many things that shape our critical inner voice, from negative attitudes directed
toward us to attitudes our parents had toward themselves. As we get older, we internalize these points of
view as our own. We keep these attitudes alive by believing in our insecurities as we go along in life. The
most common critical inner voices Dr.’s Robert and Lisa Firestone found people to experience throughout
their day include:
You’re stupid.
You’re unattractive.
You never get anything right.
No one will ever love you.
You’re such a loser.
You’ll never make friends.
You’ll never be able to quit drinking (smoking etc).
What’s the point in even trying?
Insecurity at Work
Insecurity can affect us in countless areas of our lives. Every person will notice their inner critic being
more vocal in one area or another. For example, you may feel pretty confident at work but completely lost
in your love life or vice versa. Some common critical inner voices about one’s career include:
You don’t know what you’re doing.
Who do you think you are? You’ll never be successful.
Zodiac - Taken from: http://www.psychicguild.com/horoscopes_explained.php
Text - adapted from: http://www.psychalive.org/how-to-overcome-insecurity/
